mediocrity is not an attribute in a person...it's a way of life...MY WAY OF LIFE!!!

Was standing on the edge of the ocean trying to decide whether to jump or not...would it be safe or not..
Then looked down...smiled...i wasa already wearing swimming trunks..it was never up to me to decide...all i had to do and could do was take that plunge..
i took a deep breath...now laughing...ready or not..here i come!!

Frustration!

7 Hrs on sleep in the last 60 hrs...3-4 hrs of it on a plane...
All your aspirations bottled into one day...one interview..
When the stakes are so high..one bad day and one year gone..like a click of the finger..
And once all this is done..I sit here contemplating how bad did I do?!?...and I fear the answer that is already there in the back of my mind..
I hate this uncanny knack of mine...already knowing that the worst is going to happen before it actually does..ppl say I'm being pessimistic...but i know these things..and they come true..
Research that would have taken hardly half an hour will possibly cost me a year in my career...this pin prick will irritate me for a long time to come..and I can't let go of this...failure on your own account is often very hard to digest...and I am highly constipated right now...so to say!..

Kahan chali gayi hai saali khushi!!!

5:15 am
Saturday.
05.03.11

Just getting back from the station..
The chill in the air matches the chill in the heart...one of those nights when sleep eludes and the person to put me to sleep eludes me much more still...what is it that keeps me awake at night...what is it that makes me perennially sad...makes me the bitter, cold person that i have become...i wonder!

I have stopped writing..Its said that one often does the thing that they are good at(atleast they think they are good at anyway) when sad or down...then why have I stoppped writing?
What is it that i am so ashamed of that i dont want its evidence on paper.

You got that right!...i am ashamed...
Of who I have become..what I have become more like it...
Pranav Iyer...the great one...reduced to the level of a rodent..rotting and filthy..filthy in thoughts and in action...I disgust myself and the ones around me...I have become a disease plauging others...
A disease eating away who i was meant to be...
I want it to stop...I want all of this to go away..I want to go away...
Pl. make it stop...someone...pl. save my soul, or what's left of it...

I wait...I wait in vain..but i wait..

Time Travel.

I want to time travel…I want to go back in time…

To a much simpler time…a time when future plans meant deciding when to leave for Chamunda…

Where” immediate concerns” meant if we would get a bike and how much gas to put in..

I want to go back to a time when the word girlfriend did not exist in our
dictionaries…

A time when I didn’t need a cell phone to keep track of the whereabouts of my best friends…coz they were all there right next to me…

A time when a party meant EG-7/EG-5/BG-7.

A time when daman was our Goa and Goa was our Amsterdam…

A time when we met to make plans and did not make plans to meet…

A time when seniors and juniors meant a lot and batch mates meant everything…

A time when bubba,haawa,baba,manju,kaka,zubu,macha and iyer meant one thing…inseparable..

I want to go back in time…

The day i died!!

Hmm…its been just 2 weeks and I’m already bored…I mean sure…it was very exciting at first…to be escorted by angels and all…I couldn’t even believe that I was going to heaven to begin with…it’s a pity that I can’t share funny facts with my friends about life in heaven.

1.God welcomes u at the doors…and agrees to grant you one wish (except going back to earth)…it’s a pity that all I could think of at that time was to make him do somersaults…impeccable. But a chance wasted…I wonder how he tap dances…hopefully the next person in requests to see that…

2.You get an ID badge for being in heaven…they have in times and out times and all that…and you’d think that the world is made in the reflection of heaven…

3.You are allowed to visit earth once in every month…but you can’t communicate with ppl…just stalk them…a guy in here has seen all the famous celebrities naked…too bad he’s dead and can’t do anything about it…oh didn’t I tell you…when you’re dead…you wiener kind of dies too…no aids STDS here in heaven.

4.You get to choose how you look. This was a smart move on the part of the admin guys…you see the accident cases and murdered people were just killing the entire serene mood of the place. So you find a lot Tom Cruises and Clint Eastwood. Poor Heath Ledger and Michael Jackson have to entertain a lot of stupid questions.

5.There is an exchange program held annually where in ppl get to go to hell. I think
I’ll enroll for that. It’ll be fun going there…and I’m pretty sure I’ll see a lot many more celebs there than here.

Well that’s about it for now, I’ll update you later…it’s not like you are going anywhere. And I’ll be damned if I leave this place (see…again... how I played with words there…I’m good. pity I didn’t use it when I was alive)

PS: I don’t know why I wrote this piece of shit today…pl. don’t judge me (LMAO!!...I’m on a roll today)

priceless!!!

1 yr of coaching classes-21k
endless sleepless nights of worries-5k(present rates of madhosh bar applicable)
the days leading up to the exam-1k

screwing up ur exam and to top it all..seeing ur ex-flame at the center-PRICELESS..
there are somethings money can buy...for everything else...there's FML!!